Iíve had this [great] comic book in my collection for years, only because the coverís so damned funny and original, but today I read it and just had to give it a retro review.

Hansi is the story of a young woman from Sudetenland who experiences the coming of the Nazi party to her homeland. She is given a free education and learns that there are scientific alternatives to learning that are not found in the Bible. Gosh, so far, so good. Hansi becomes very loyal to the Nazi party and actually never relents in her devotion until Hitler commits suicide.

Hansi is then sent to an East Germany labor camp run by the Russians. She soon learns that Russian soldiers rape women, but Hansi doesnít get raped because sheís ďtoo skinny.Ē Hansi then bribes a ferry pilot to guide her to West Germany and the American camp. She is told that Americans are ďall bubble-gum chewing gangstersĒ but even that is better than remaining with the Russian rapists. Hansi finds the American camp and is indeed met by a solider chewing bubble-gum, however, Hansi learns that this soldier does not want to rape her because he is a good American and reads Archie comic books.

Well, after gaining entrance to the United States, Hansi becomes an elementary school teacher and ends up reunited with her long lost German boyfriend whom we now know didnít die when his U-boat sank.

They get married, but "something was missing" in their lives. Luckily, the husband (obviously desperate and about to get kicked out) brings home a Bible. Soon Hansi decides, "Iím going to take God at his word," and becomes an American Christian, despite the presence of a hippy culture in America that obviously does not take pride in their country of abundant food supplies and saving accounts.

Hansiís epiphany moment comes when she leads a class of children in the pledge of allegiance. At first she feels conflicted in giving her loyalty to another country, you know, since things didnít work out so well with the Nazis. Yet, when she gets to the "one nation under God" part she realizes everything is okay. She thinks (via thought balloon): "Those words [one nation under God] make all the difference! It's all right to love what God has blessed!" The mind control kicks in and Hansi decides to truly commit to her love for Jesus and America, despite the presence of so many hippies, because after all, they did give her that teaching job.

Well, in reviewing this, I felt like I really had to recap the story for you so youíd understand the specialness that is Hansi. From one mind control unit to a really scary moment of Russian chaos to a better system of mind control.

Hansi the Girl Who Loved the Swastika was published by Spire Christian Comics in 1976, but her story is really not too far off the beam from what many kids go through today. If youíre not specifically "Christian" in mainstream America ó you are an outsider, and you donít deserve to have blonde hair, blue eyes, a teaching job, and a good marriage. Well, Iím editorializing there just a bit, but why not ó it is a free country, isnít it?

"Hansi the Girl Who Loved the Swastika (Review)" by Bradley Mason Hamlin © 2007 Mystery Island Publications.
Published 09.18.07. All rights reserved.